At the end of the second year of our studies and formation at the seminary, we are sent to different hospitals for our clinical pastoral education program (CPE). CPE is part of our training to provide pastoral and spiritual care to individuals and families facing crises, particularly those caused by illness. Through this experience, we gain a broader understanding of ministry, develop greater self-awareness, and build skills in collaborative relationships with the healthcare team.

One of my CPE assignments was in a pediatric oncology unit. I met patients as young as two years old who suffered from devastating illnesses. These children underwent overwhelming diagnostic and treatment procedures, such as chemotherapy and transplants, in the hope of improving their health. Some were fortunate and responded well to treatments; however, others did not and died.

Encountering Suffering in Pediatric Oncology

On my first day in the unit, I met Gregory Smith (not his real name) and his family. They came to the hospital for a bone marrow transplant, a last resort to treat Gregory for a rare form of lymphoma. Mr. and Mrs. Smith confided that they have been in and out of two other hospitals since Gregory was diagnosed. His illness kept on recurring.

While they were attending to their son, Mr. and Mrs. Smith were also preoccupied with meeting their family’s needs. During Gregory’s hospitalization, they alternated between caring for their two other children, who stayed home and attended school. They also had to arrange their schedules so they could go to work.

When Treatment Could Do No More

Gregory underwent a bone marrow transplant and continued with his treatment for days. Everything was going well until one Friday afternoon, when he suddenly became extremely sick. He became jaundiced and developed a high fever. The doctors ordered extensive laboratory work. A few hours later, his attending physician returned with teary eyes. He broke the news that Gregory’s body rejected the transplant. The cancer had also spread to both lungs and his liver. All medical options were exhausted, and there seemed to be no chance for recovery. Two days later, Gregory died.

The Questions Illness Raises

Ministering to the sick and their family exposed me to the reality of how illness interrupts family dynamics and activities. It also brings different kinds of feelings and intense psychological and spiritual tensions. In the midst of difficulties and challenges brought about by illness, patients and their families may sometimes raise a number of important questions. Why does God allow sickness, pain and suffering to happen, especially in an untimely manner? If it is true that God is a healer and savior, then why doesn’t He heal our loved one from this devastating illness? At times they feel uncertain of God’s graciousness.

Finding Consolation in Faith

However, in the midst of the heartrending situations and uncertainties, many find consolation from their faith. Their faith offers them serenity and comfort. Their faith gives them an optimistic perspective of their suffering. Their faith helps them curtail the extreme physical, emotional and spiritual burdens of illness.

These are commonly raised questions the patient and their family try to deal with while trying to muster the efforts necessary to survive from their illness. Understanding this situation enables us to realize what illness really means and how important it is to respond to the sick person with genuine compassion.

What Does It Mean to Be Sick?

Beyond the medical and scientific aspects of illness and healing, we can reflect further on the human meaning of these phenomena by asking what it means to be sick. To be sick means to suffer from pain, discomfort and inadequate functioning of our body systems. Illness brings up restrictions of one’s usual and most wanted activities, even eating favorite foods.

Illness Affects the Whole Family

As a result of sickness, one also suffers from social isolation. This can include being disconnected from one’s friends, work, and loved ones. Family members often have changes in roles and functions to accommodate the sick. These role changes may be temporary or permanent depending on the recovery or outcome of the illness. For instance, the oldest daughter might assume the role of a mother, or the father assumes the roles of both parents. On top of all these modifications, illness also brings an increased financial burden. All these events can lead to mental depression and, often spiritual exhaustion.

The Emotional and Spiritual Burden of Illness

Illness may bring temptations, discouragement, and desolation. Most sick people, especially those who suffer from pain and discomfort, are naturally preoccupied with getting well. As a result, their primary focus may be on alleviating the burden of illness. They do not intend to avoid conversations and meeting people. The discomfort prevents them from having meaningful experiences with others.

Sickness Is More Than a Medical Condition

Reflecting on these dimensions of illness makes it clear that sickness is more than a medical phenomenon. When someone is sick, their total well-being is challenged. While illness can lead to distress and self-absorption, or even hopelessness and revolt against God, it can also lead to a deeper quest for God and a return to Him. God also uses our illness and sufferings to help us reflect on the fragility and temporariness of human life.

When Suffering Leads Us Deeper

An experience of illness may provide the stimulus we need to reflect on deeper, more enduring issues in life. Sickness and suffering are sometimes used by God to draw us through our humanity and reflect on the real meaning of our existence. Such events can bring the sick and the community together to a deeper appreciation of their relationship with God. This is a challenging process, given the vulnerability of our human nature. However, in the end, the person of faith understands that the need for inner healing is more important than any cure for physical illness.

Healing Does Not Always Mean a Cure

Like Gregory, not everyone is cured of an illness. However, healing can happen in ways that don’t always involve a physical cure. Often, it means finding peace in the midst of illness or pain. Healing isn’t only about focusing on what we like and think will happen; it’s also about welcoming and finding peace with what can happen.

Finding Healing in God’s Grace

Beyond all the struggles and efforts to regain health, something extraordinary does happen when our faith is not devastated by the apprehension of illness and death. Healing is achieved when the sick and his/her loved ones express readiness to accept God’s plan, whether there is a physical cure or not. This may not be what most of us would label a “miracle,” but it is indeed an awe-inspiring effect of the grace which transcends the patterns of the purely natural in ordinary human experience.